Adoption Support

We’re a community that understands you and your family. Spence-Chapin’s Modern Family Center provides birth parents, adoptive parents, and adoptees a supportive community and a connection to professionals who understand the unique aspects of adoption.

Services are provided through Spence-Chapin’s Modern Family Center.

Call or email our team to learn more: 646-539-2167 and info@modernfamilycenter.org!

Post-Adoption Support (www.spence-chapin.org/community-counseling) All of Spence-Chapin’s post-adopt support services are available to the entire adoption community! Our post adoption services include:

  • Parent Coaching helps parents build confidence in their parenting style. Common themes explored: navigating open adoption, understanding adoption & identity in your family, finding the right words for tough conversations, and navigating change. Read more
  • Community Events: meet other adoptive families at monthly playgroups (Bagels & Blox), cultural events, lifebook workshops, and community celebrations! Sign up on our events calendar
  • Our Mentorship Program for adopted middle and high school students empowers adoptees through friendship, building self-confidence and challenging them to discover and understand their adoption identities and experiences. Mentors and mentees enjoy meaningful community, educational, and social outings throughout the school year. Join us next semester by downloading the free application online. Click to read FAQs
  • Mental Health Services from adoption-competent therapists. Our experienced staff of adult and child therapists help individuals, couples, and families navigate challenges, life transitions, relationships, parenting, anxiety, or depression. We specialize in adoption, anxiety, depression, ADHD, family and relationship problems, and stress. Email today to schedule a free intake call with a social worker! Financial assistance may be available to persons connected to adoption.
  • ADHD & Emotional Regulation Treatment Spence-Chapin is committed to supporting and advocating for children with ADHD and their families. Our licensed professionals use evidence based assessment tools to help children develop the skills and self-esteem necessary to manage ADHD with little to no medication. To provide the best treatment model possible, the therapists at Spence-Chapin’s Modern Family Center have developed a video to help parents better understand the signs and symptoms of ADHD in children. Read more
  • Birthland trips for adopted persons and their families to visit their birth country. Spence-Chapin provides emotional support for individuals and families preparing for a birthland trip.
  • Personal Adoption History for adoptees, birth parents, and siblings. Spence-Chapin Services to Families and Children maintains thousands of adoption records from its 109-year history. Spence-Chapin, as an authorized agency, is also the custodian of the adoption records of Louise Wise Services and Talbot Perkins. Read more 
  • Community Education provides workshops for families, parent groups, and professionals including schools, religious organizations, PTAs, camps, and community groups. Topics include: Adoption in the Schools, Common Parenting FAQs, Understanding Open Adoption, and Finding the Right Words for Tough Conversations. Read more

 Pre-Adoption Support

Consultations are available for anyone before or during their adoption process. A pre-adoption consultation is an opportunity for you to speak one-on-one with one of our skilled social workers in our office, on the phone, or through video chat. Families come in to discuss a variety of topics, including preparing for an open adoption, adopting a child of a different race, emotional support during the wait for an adoption, helping spouses who aren’t on the same page about adoption decisions, and speaking with potential birth parents. Consultations are available at any point of an adoption journey. Professional service fee: $150/session

Follow Spence-Chapin on Facebook and YouTube for updates, stories, and more!

Domestic Adoption FAQs

Families often have many questions as they are beginning an adoption process. These FAQs will help you decide if adopting through Spence-Chapin’s Domestic Adoption Program is the right path for you to grow your family.

1.  Who are the children in need of adoption?
The children in need of adoption through our Domestic Adoption Program are newborns to approximately 8 weeks old. The babies reflect the racial and ethnic diversity of the NYC Metro Area; most children are of Black or Latino backgrounds. Families adopting through this program need to be open to parenting a child of either gender.

2.  Who can adopt through this program?
We are often asked who can adopt. We are happy to share that all types of parents adopt: married couples, unmarried couples, LGBTQIA+ parents, single women and single men can adopt. Families who are already parenting adopt, as do families who are transitioning out of fertility treatments.  Families of all ages, income levels, ethnicities, and religions adopt. Truly, the one thing that all adoptive families have in common is that they want to be parents – and from there they are as diverse as the kids themselves.

3.  What is open adoption?
What if I want a closed adoption? How is open adoption negotiated? Open adoption is when adoptive and birth families meet and are able to have ongoing contact with each other at their own discretion. Frequency and type of communication can range from the exchange of letters and emails, phone calls, shared pictures, and visits. Open adoption is not co-parenting. It is an opportunity for birth and adoptive families to develop a relationship that will benefit the adopted child. Research shows that open adoption is beneficial to all members of the adoption triad: the birth parents, the adoptive parents and the adopted person. Having access to their birth parent can help an adopted person develop a better sense of self with access to information about his or her background. Families who are the best candidates for Spence-Chapin’s Domestic Adoption Program are open to periodic exchange of emails, photos, and visits with the birth family. Adoptive parents and birth parents each have their own social worker at Spence-Chapin. Your social worker will help you establish an open adoption plan that is comfortable to both you and your child’s birth parent(s). Both adoptive families and birth parents will get support from their social worker throughout this process.

4.  What are the common medical risks?
Many infants in need of adoption have some risks or unknowns in their medical backgrounds.Some of the infants come from backgrounds where they may have been exposed to cigarette smoke, recreational drugs, and/or social drinking during pregnancy. Good candidates for the Domestic Adoption Program are open to some risks and unknowns in the child’s medical history. This is something you will discuss with your social worker throughout your adoption process.

5.  Who are the birth parents?
Any woman of childbearing age could find herself in the position of an unplanned pregnancy. All birth parents have a great deal of love for their baby. They want to make a plan to give the baby a stable life that they are unable to provide at time of birth. Spence-Chapin’s experienced social workers provide intensive unbiased options counseling to biological parents in the NYC metro area to help them make the decision that is right for them and for their baby.

6.  What is the matching process and how does it work?
Birth parents select an adoptive family by reviewing adoptive family profiles with their social worker. Once they have narrowed their choice down to one family, a match meeting is held between the birth family and the adoptive family. Both the adoptive family’s social worker and the birth parent’s social worker are present for this meeting to provide guidance and support. Adoptive families wait an average of 1-2 years to be matched after completing their home study.

7.  What is interim care?
We understand that women and their partners need time and space to make a decision about the future of their family, especially after a recent birth of a child. Spence-Chapin’s Interim Care Program allows babies to be cared for in a loving home by a nurturing caregiver so that biological parents have additional time to plan for their child. Biological parents retain parental rights while their baby is in Interim Care and are free to visit their child. Our interim care givers are families who are trained and screened to care for the newborns on a temporary basis. Interim care allows the birth parents to feel confident in their plan before making the decision to place the infant for adoption.

8.  What are the next steps if I want to apply?
Join the next Domestic Adoption webinar!
Register at: www.spence-chapin.org/events.

Still have questions? Schedule a pre-adoption consultation or phone call with one of our adoption experts! Call: 212-400-8150 or Email: info@spence-chapin.org

Spence-Chapin Services

Spence-Chapin provides free options counseling for pregnant women & biological parents.
If you are unsure about parenting, you have choices in creating the best plan for your baby or child. This is your decision and we are here to help.

WE PROVIDE:

  • FREE, confidential, and unbiased pregnancy options counseling.
  • We will visit you anywhere in the New York City metro area! (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, Staten Island, Bronx, Long Island, the Hudson Valley, Westchester, New Jersey and Connecticut)
  • We cover pregnancy related expenses.
  • We can connect you to quality prenatal care.
  • FREE interpreters and our staff speaks English, Spanish, and Chinese.
  • Considering adoption? Click to read FAQs online.

www.spence-chapin.org/options-counseling
Call: 800-321-LOVE (5683)
Email: helpline@spence-chapin.org


RESOURCES

Not sure if you are pregnant or seeking medical help? Here are resources to explore:

Medical and Prenatal Care
These providers offer medical and prenatal care and answer questions related to pregnancy:

Text and Online chat with Planned Parenthood:
Text “PPNOW” to 774636 (PPINFO) · www.plannedparenthood.org/all-access/chat

Choices Women Medical Center
Women’s Health Services:
147-32 Jamaica Ave, Jamaica, NY 11435
(718) 534-3800 · www.choicesmedical.com

Gouverneur Health
Health services in Manhattan:
227 Madison St, New York, NY 10002
(212) 238-7000 · www.gothamhealth.org/centers/gouverneur.html

MIC Women’s Health
Centers in Brooklyn serve the Bronx, Brooklyn, Manhattan, Queens, and Staten Island     (718) 522-1144 · healthsolutions.org/mic

Planned Parenthood
       National: 800-230-PLAN (7526) – for routing to local resources

New York City: (212) 965-7000
26 Bleecker St · (Manhattan)
21-41 45th Rd · (Queens)
44 Court Street, 6th Floor · (Brooklyn)
2nd Floor, 349 E 149th Street · (Bronx)
23 Hyatt Street · (Staten Island)

New Jersey:
Ironbound Health Center:
70 Adams St #13, Newark, NJ 07105
(973) 465-7707

Chubb Health Center:
240 Mulberry St, Newark, NJ 07105
(973) 622-3900

East Orange Health Center:
560 Dr Martin Luther King Jr Blvd #100, East Orange, NJ 07018
(973) 674-4343

Montclair Health Center:
29 N Fullerton Ave, Montclair, NJ 07042
(973) 746-7116

Elizabeth Health Center:
1150 Dickinson St, Elizabeth, NJ 07201
(908) 351-5384

Englewood Health Center:
46 N Van Brunt St, Englewood, NJ 07631
(201) 894-0966

North of NYC:
Yonkers Health Center:
20 S Broadway, Yonkers, NY 10701
(914) 965-1912

White Plains Health Center:
175 Tarrytown Rd, White Plains, NY 10607
(914) 761-6566

Long Island:
Hempstead Health Center:
540 Fulton Ave, Hempstead, NY 11550
(516) 750-2500

Glen Cove Health Center:
110 School St, Glen Cove, NY 11542
(516) 750-2500

West Islip Health Center:
180 Sunrise Hwy, West Islip, NY 11795
(631) 893-0150

Smithtown Health Center:
70 Maple Ave, Smithtown, NY 11787
(631) 361-7526

Connecticut:
Stamford Health Center:
35 6th St, Stamford, CT 06905
(203) 327-2722


MENTAL HEALTH RESOURCES

  • Lifenet: 1-800-LIFENET (1-800-543-3638) is a free, confidential help line for New York City residents available 24/7. The hotline’s staff of trained mental health professionals help callers find mental health and substance abuse services.
  • Suicide Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or website: www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org.
  • NYC Well: 1-888-NYC-WELL (1-888-692-9355) 24/7 Suicide prevention and crisis counseling, Peer support and short-term counseling via telephone, text and web, Assistance scheduling appointments or accessing other mental health services, Follow-up to check that you have connected to care
  • NJ Family Help Line: 1-800-THE KIDS (1-800-843-5437) If you’re feeling stressed out, call the Family Helpline and work through your frustrations before a crisis occurs.

ADDITIONAL COMMUNITY RESOURCES

  • Health Hotlines for Moms: partners.text4baby.org/index.php/health-info-for-moms
  • NYC Sexual Health Clinics: Health Department Sexual Health Clinics provide low- to no-cost services www1.nyc.gov/site/doh/services/sexual-health-clinics.page
  • Prenatal Care Assistance Program (PCAP): Medicaid and WIC for low-income pregnant and newly parenting women in New York State, 1-800-522-5006
  • NYC Women’s Health Services: Comprehensive prenatal and family planning services, 866-642-5589
  • NJ Family Care: Insurance for low-income, pregnant and newly-parenting women and their families 1-800-701-0710 www.njfamilycare.org
  • NJWIC State Office: 609-292-9560 www.state.nj.us
  • National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
  • NYC Parent Helpline: 1-800-CHILDREN (244-5373)
  • South Hampton Women Infants and Children (WIC) Program: 631-268-1020
  • Suffolk County Perinatal Coalition: 631-475-5400
  • Nassau County WIC Program: 516-571-1WIC (1942)

If you are experiencing a medical emergency, are in danger, or are feeling suicidal, call 911 immediately.

NYC Pride March: Save the Date

Last year Spence-Chapin staff and community participated in the NYC Pride March for the first time and had a memorable experience! We’re thrilled to be walking in the March alongside LGBTQ parents, their families, and their allies again on June 25th and we invite you to join us! 

  1. There are multiple exit points throughout the march. Come walk with us for a few blocks or the entire route! We will be meeting at 11:30AM at 120 Park Avenue – NW corner of 41stSt.
  2. Marching contingents are given check-in and step-off times. We will wait in the formation area near Grand Central Station for about 2 hours before our group officially enters the march. Our estimated step-off time is 2:00PM. If you join us, we encourage you to bring food, water, sunscreen, and other necessities. There are portable relief facilities and water filling stations at several points within the formation area.
  3. We are located in the front of the middle section of the March. This means less time waiting in the formation area.
  4. The march typically takes 60-90 minutes to travel from formation to dispersal area (near Stonewall Inn).
  5. We are going to have a fun and rewarding day in the sun! It’s amazing to hear from spectators along the route about how they are connected to the adoption community.
  6. All are invited to join us as we celebrate the LGBTQ community so bring your closest friends and family members. Email jornstein@spence-chapin.org to learn more and sign up!

To contact us on the day of the event call: 917-885-1477

Preschoolers and ADHD

ADHD is defined by impairing levels of inattention, disorganization, and/or hyperactivity. Children as young as age 4 can be diagnosed with ADHD. Children are meeting huge developmental milestones physically, cognitively, and emotionally at this age. They are constantly learning new skills and absorbing everything around them. At the same time, preschoolers can sometimes be defiant and unpredictable and many of them act out their emotions in aggressive ways. They are verbal and opinionated people so, how do we know if our child is exhibiting typical preschooler behavior or showing early signs of ADHD?

Does your child:
• Have a hard time starting projects such as homework?
• Fidget or squirm when seated?
• Have a hard time following directions?
• Interrupt or intrude on others?
• Forget things or daily tasks?
• Have difficulty keeping materials and belongings in order?
• Become easily distracted
• Have difficulty working or playing quietly?
• Have frequent tantrums?

All of these behaviors can make life at home chaotic and disorganized and affect your child’s academic achievement and social development. Spence-Chapin’s licensed professionals can provide parents with behavioral management tips and techniques to improve your child’s self-esteem and ADHD symptoms as well as decrease parental stress.
CALL TODAY TO SCHEDULE YOUR FREE CONSULTATION
646-539-2167
Link: http://www.modernfamilycenter.org/counseling/

4 Ways to Celebrate Lunar New Year!

Lunar New Year is one of the most important holidays for Chinese families and is also celebrated by other East Asian countries like Korea, Vietnam, Thailand, and Japan. This year is the 25th anniversary of Spence-Chapin’s China international adoption program and over 40 years of international adoption. Lunar New Year is a chance to wish family and friends a lucky and prosperous new year. Here are some ways you can celebrate the year of the Rooster:

Enjoy Time with Family
Holidays are a great way to get together with family. New Year’s Eve dinner is called “reunion dinner” and is believed to be the most important meal of the year. Yum!

Decorate
Red is the main color of Lunar New Year and is believed to be lucky. Bring your family good fortune by filling your home with red décor.

Attend a Cultural Event
Festivals, parades, and fairs are arranged in many cities and towns both nationally and internationally. At these events, families can see traditional dragon dances and other performances. Organizers might even hand out traditional Chinese products and snacks. Check out what’s happening in NYC on Lunar New Year: http://betterchinatown.com/upcoming-events/

Eat Lucky Foods
Certain foods bring symbolic meaning. The Chinese word for fish sounds like the word for surplus. It is believed that eating fish will bring a lucrative new year.

We hope that you and your family have a happy and healthy 2017 and we wish all of our families that celebrate Lunar New Year Gong Xi Fa Cai/Saehae Bok Mani Badeuseyo!

To learn more about our post-adoption services for adoptive families and adoptees, visit our website: www.modernfamilycenter.org/adoption-support.